Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one getting burned.
568-488 BC, Founder of Buddhism
The thing that usually creates anger within us is what another person
is doing or not doing. Whatever it may be, our anger is in direct proportion
to our level of disagreement or un-acceptance.
This would seemingly infer that deep within our psyche is the belief that we
have some great, mystical power of control and are in some way
responsible for their actions or inactions.
The serenity prayer gives us a well grounded ideal to follow:
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change.
While I know that I have the potential to affect another person over a
period of time by planting seeds of love & kindness. I cannot do
much to alter that persons immediate perception or reality.
The courage to change the things I can.
I can change & control my actions, my words, my perception.
I can choose the type of seed I will plant & wait, trusting that in due
season it will grow & bear fruit.
The wisdom to know the difference.
By thinking & meditating on the above the wisdom is birthed.
I can change myself & over due season encourage positive change in
another, the ultimate change however is entirely up to them.
The opposite of anger is peace, tranquility, calm, harmony.
The measure of our inner peace & harmony will be determined by our
capacity for accepting what is.
“I will have no serenity until I accept that, person, place, thing or
situation as being exactly the way it’s meant to be at this moment.”
(pg. 449 of the Big Book of AA)
Anger, like a venomous bite creates discord, pain & confusion.
The only antitoxin is understanding & forgiveness.
This is what we have the power & control over. To determine whether
we will live in un-acceptance & anger, or empathy & compassion.